Things That Make Me Smile

So I reached home around 11pm yesterday. When unboard the Komuter, the ticket automated doors all not working, and no officer on sight to collect tickets manually. Since I'm using Touch n Go I guess it was a free ride?

I went into my room and noticed it was squeky cleaaaaan and shining. Mama must have cleaned it up for me. The bed smells like some complicated flower and I love the feeling when you rub your feet in between duvets. The friction (between duvet and my skin, please don't get the wrong idea) calms me down.

Being away from home since 16, I learn something. You never will open your book and study once you step your home-sick feet in the house. Let go all the high hopes and good intentions at the hostel room. Leave the books and spare spaces in the travelling bag for some home cook food and parents-paid toiletries. Or maybe bring one journal (be sure it is as light as feather, so it won't eat up your spaces in the bag) for you to peep in case the guilt feeling is overwhelming.

One thing I take up after internship is, waking up late is a waste of time. Especially at home. Even though the major plan of the day is mopping every inch of the floor, having an early day may allows you to squeeze something else like, facial(this is rare but I would like the options), A&W waffles, or good old friends.

You are sure your mother can be candy-sweet when she gave a long-tight-cut hoodie of your favourite color. Despite she despised my taste of color which according to her, plain and boring, but for me cool and relax, and added, maybe I can wear it to class. Thank you mama. My class is going to end in 2 months, but still?

I gasped exaggeratedly when I stepped on the weighing scale and I am a big fat 48 kilos. I used to weigh 46 since forever (forever starts after my gemuk asrama episode, which is 6 years ago). Oh maybe 48k is still ok. Nothing to be freaked out kannn???

I was jumping up and down the trampoline when my brother Qusyairi said
'Kenapa Kak Haney jump tak graceful langsung??'

Well, maybe you I can take up some of your 'grace'!

Living the Student Life

Mammmaa..wait for me.
Going home over the weekend.
And let's not think about anything else whilst indulging home-cooked foods, and pastries.

But tomorrow aint sunshine and rainbow.
I have

1. One progress report (haven't started yet, no suprise there)
2. Operation Construction Management Test (I am such an odd fish in the construction class, I know nothing!)
3. HRM Assignment (all about essay writing, article findings, completed that like DAYS AGO)
4. Meeting with the FYP Supervisor to 'discuss' about my progress.

Bring it on the Mr Thursday, there'll be sweet reward at the end of the day!

Look For Her : The Next Project Runway Star!

I have no talent or whatsoever (this is my HRM lecturer favourite word) in art.
None.
If you dig my entire human system, there's no single cell looks artsy.

My father is a born artiste, I might say. He can play guitar and sing quite well (according to my standards) Besides, he draws beautifully. Most of the times he's my ultimate savior, because he re-do my Pendidikan Seni homeworks. Except yg chop chop pakai batang keladi, daun bunga raya, or potato tu lah, itu I sangat suka buat.

That is why, I find it weird when I draw a simple face of human, it always looks cartoony. I sing terribly (ask the bf and Fifa, they know better). I still stuck with a skill of orang lidi. And if I draw a circle, the two endpoints always do not meet at the same place. When he taught me drawing techniques (such as using the brush techniques using water colors to color trees), my leaves always seemed to be too cluttered and too 'pressurized'. And the tree trunks always look bigger and out of scale.

I had tried to find the art-soul in me. Thus, I quit several years ago, when I know I am yet, helpless.

I always believe I am my father favourite child (something tells me that somewhere)
Until I saw this drawing by my sister, Durane, I know my anak emas position is at stake.

No this is not really a news for me. I've known her fashion-sketch frenzy since we shared the same room 21 years ago. But this is really something.

She said she wants to take part in Project Runway Malaysia. My little advice is : Kau tu jahit pun tak reti, reti lukis je!

Fine, maybe I can share the favourite position with her instead.

Do I Ever Cross Your Mind

You want to know what I am doing at the moment?

I have been listening to sad, slow break up song. Brian Mcknight, Innuendo, Mariah Carey, old Nsync, Babyface, Ronan Keating. But the roomate is singing along, and the night is cold, and no, we are neither dealing with heart breaks, nor heart breakers.

Cant remember why we fell apart
from something that was so meant to be
forever was the promise in our hearts
and more and more I wonder where you are
do I ever cross your mind?
any time,
do you ever wake up reaching out for me
do I ever cross your mind?
any time,
I miss you
-Brian Mcknight's Do I Ever Cross Your Mind.

Dealing with breakup is something very painful to remember. I know it's tragic, being left behind. (and it's much more tragic if you are the one who left ;p)

But I know my friends are a bunch of strong girls.
Why?
Because they sure about what they want, and what they don't.
Besides, they get over the break up for a month! BRAVO!
Isn't that the most beautiful thing?

P/S This entry does not concern anyone in patricular escpecially Zu.

Suprised?

No you are not in the wrong page.

I just edit the layout. (not very sure what I was doing actually)
Did you know all the designer blogspot skin is very much unlike me. So I resort to this classic template.

When complete, I thought the page is bloated with words, that they might scare away some people I know. So I decide to put some pretty good pictures, just to put on colors (and reminisce good times - that one too, of course). To Azra, I could not find any pictures of us, when I do, sure your little-doctor-face will be up there love!

Purposely there is no face of the bf on sight. I'm just not sure I should, because he's quite reserved(have re-check this fact with him later!) and hate cameras like no other. Basically what I am trying to say here, no good-updated photos of us. Yet!

Enjoy (or not, whatever) the new skin!

Good Old Years

We, as in the bf and I (who else) were having lunch while having intense conversation. Well, the times we don' talk during meal are 1) on fight, 2) there's someone else present (my friends, my mother?) 3) we are very very hungry

He has been eyeing this Sony Vaio (sort of) computer plus huge LCD screen. I'm not very good at describing it, but somehow it's like the Sony version of Apple TV if I'm not mistaken.
So from Sony, to Apple, to short life span of laptop from pc, to my sister's bf, the conversation switched very quickly.

Me : Haah, my friends semua pun dah tukar laptop. By end of 5 years almost semua dah tukar laptop baru. (ops not all. one of them just get hers at the end of her study years). Such short life time lah agaknya laptop ni.

Then he went saying that his pc has served him a good five years too, despite his friends' computers who need replacement already.

Me : Pc I pun! Dah 5 tahun dah.

The bf : Ye lah, tapi awal2 dulu pc you banyak problem. Selalu kena format.

Me : Tu mula-mula... Sekarang dah 5 years, the problems fixed, dah stable and steady.
Just like our relationship!

Silence.
Awkward.
Krukk krukk.

Loving and Caring

Zaza, not in the picture, doing what she does best, goes missing.



Recently watched - Martian Child, 10 0000 BC.
Current mood - Loving and caring
Weather - Raining and cold
Craving -Vincci+ wedges which I cannot afford after close considerations
On the go - Craig David's Trust Me

I'm not in the mood to write much today. Back right here in UTP and it's raining as always.

Last Sunday Natasha, Fifa, Zaza and I crashed Pavilion and Bangsar for clothes hunt.
Zaza spend like millionaire. A committed shopper she is.
Fifa bought sandal to match her short pants (yang macam seluar pendek sekolah Cina kalau I pakai).

Nat and I, who came all the way from Seremban, were left solely to suffer the balls of feet, all blames go to high heels.
Anyway, I had fun. The Delicious' chocolate cake and apple crumble are literally to die for.

On the other note, honestly, I tried very hard not to blurb my thoughts about the recent SPR12. No, not today.

Every time I want to voice out (in blog, because somehow your thoughts will be documented, and I hate that), I feel little and shallow.
Yes I do.

Jangan cakap buruk pasal orang lain sudah, kan?

Saturday, the 8th

We are on the mid semester break. Parents with other school kids would say oh lucky us! UTP's breaks is as the same as school break since 5 years back. Well, well.

Natasha & I were very excited to go for a swim, that I put on my swimsuit and she picked me up around 9 am. Only to realise that the pool is closed due to the Pilihanraya.

You know what frustrate me the most?
Is when you had put on the swimsuit and get your heart all giddy up.
Then the pool is closed.

Usually when this happens at UTP, I end up continuing my sleep till I forget how frustrated I was. But instead, I did the house laundry. Pile and baskets of laundry. Anything that has to do with water seems so therapeutic.

Hmm, Nat, next Monday we'll see how flat they are and how stretchy our *** are OK.

Am going for BBQ potluck at aunty's. Catch ya later alligator!

So You Vote?

It's the voting season again. Not that really brings sweet memories to me, since my memory of Voting Day were not very strong and happy. Usually I (and my sister) were abandoned at nenek's house when the parents need to cast. Man! being left behind (we are so not used to be apart from parents) was tearful and painful. I remember chasing my dad's car just because I can't follow them to the polling station. Well, I was a lot more emotional back then.

Now that I'm 23, and registered, I can cast vote on my own.
How cool.

Well, politics are not my very best interest, so I proclaimed. But silently I do peek and glance on the Internet and making a mind travelling on my own. But so far, I succeed in making my opinion as invisible as I can. But no, not today. Today is the unfortunate day you reader have to bear with my ramblings about politics.

If people say they hate politics, I assumed it's funny. Unavoidable and everywhere, politics mingled with our lives. Office politics (you tell me) family politics, and even politics among friends. We gang up, we support, we lead, we blame, we lobby, oh yes, a lot of time we play dirty as well. We are so used to it, that we may not notice it before.

One thing I learn, don't indigneously believe everything you hear and see.
Pictures lie, rumors can be facts when you say it is, and even your heart lies sometimes, remember?

Almost everything, if we are able to look at every sides (not only two sides, yes?) and leave the frantic exploding feelings aside, everything should be okay and alright. In God's willing, of course.
After all, we are the smartest person to pick our own lanes.
And we are the one who shall walk on them.

p/s I saw the PAS signage 'Don't be fooled by Bee End' at Taman Maju traffic light junction.
Not cool man, not cool. *geleng kepala*

Calling All Redheads

Im home, btw.
And were just stepped in the house from one-each-regular-dominoes at Nat's. First we bought one regular to be shared, of course. Then upon to see the regular is actually quite tiny to our monstrous appetite, we did order another one.
To quote Natasha - 'Ni kena makan slow-slow so nanti tak kenyang pulak'
Hmm regular each tu, remember.

Oh, oh.
I finally put some color to my hair my hair.
"You nak color apa? I recommend for first timer and your skin color, brown is okay"
"But brown is boring. I want something obvious, something shouts 'this cost my chubby arm and my short leg!!' "

Red. I want red.
Bold choice. At least that's what I interpret from her expression.

Ok now I think,
I think, I look like singa.